Soliloquy...

"Lives of great men all remind us/We can make our lives sublime/And, departing, leave behind us/Footprints on the sands of time;Footprints, that perhaps another/Sailing o'er life's solemn main/A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,Seeing, shall take heart again. Let us, then, be up and doing,With a heart for any fate ;Still achieving, still pursuing,Learn to labor and to wait. Voices of The Night; A psalm of Life by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

I have mellowed over time, no longer the fiery temperamental young man...some call that maturity but I call it 'learning the ways of the world.' In it, I have had nights of introspection, trying to put meaning to why I live... It's that time of the year...the end of it..when I take stock of my deeds..my achievements..my failures...and what the world held me for and what I accrued from it.. I am doing something right now..but that iota of satisfaction is missing...the sense of being helpful lacking. What am I gaining...is it just money? In which case, I have failed in my quest to leave a worth while footprint...what am I learning..Is it anything substantial for my future quests...or am I just getting comfortable? "Better to suffer it than live under it/I'm never gonna be just fine, no way/I'm never gonna be that guy/I'm never gonna be just fine/but there are times i need you to remind me/I'm never gonna be that guy/I'm never gonna be just fine." The consequences of leaving are great...the uncertainty! But it's time I left...wander and wander till I reach my destination... It's a risk that I'm willing to take and move yonder to the unknown... Time to begin life afresh...